12.31.2009

cravings?

i made a post yesterday(?) about what my cravings have been recently. making that post led me to googling dr pepper jelly beans for a longer time than is ever necessary when craving a candy.

but today i was in a mall. (a huge one! with ramps and mezzanine levels. it was crazy!) i came across a candy store, and it hit me! they probably have individual bins of individual jelly belly jelly bean flavors!!!!! holy moley was i right! look at the haul!

oh the dr pepper goodness! this was all i allowed myself to take. otherwise i would have bought the whole bin!

happy new year!

my one and only resolution: to write entries for this blog more often... and to maybe find a job.

but along the lines of my true resolution, i want to say that the reason i started this blog was to put the weird things that come into and go out of my life out there. with my thoughts and feelings attached. this includes things i see, hear, touch, eat, and/or smell. things i think and/or feel. and everything else in between.

so tonight, instead of getting horribly drunk with friends i don't have, i stayed in. and watched my new netflix. l'auberge espagnole. a lovely movie about going off on your own to experience new and great things, while running into a few difficulties. and how these experiences change who you are. the french main character has decided to study abroad in spain, and finds a space living with 6 or 7 other students, all foreign but each from a different country. he meets other french people who have transplanted themselves to barcelona. a terribly uncultured englishman, who is the younger brother of a female roommate. and several women who all intrigue him in different ways.

the script was quite good, even with me following along to the subtitles. but the directing. i do not recommend watching this movie with even the slightest headache. the director is really big on using the camera to convey what the characters are feeling. which can get the viewer a little seasick. but the movie survived the sea wreck and it was interesting through the end. i do recommend to one and all. also if you're interested, audrey tautou, of amelie fame,  plays the role of the frenchman's girlfriend back home.

what's weird is i remember being recommended this movie by an ex-roommate's blind date. how crazy is that? when he told me about it i knew i'd like it. and that more likely than not i'd want to be friends with him. (as i knew i never would be with that roommate.) after watching it, i'm slightly sadden by not having the opportunity to get to know him more.

l'auberge espagnole at imdb.com

12.30.2009

my cravings as of late...





best purchase EVER

if you read my blog at all, you know that i'm rather adverse to capital letters. so when i write EVER, i mean it!!!

today i set out early (for me) and trekked to the aldo store at the ashland-division-milwaukee intersection. there i found my dream shoes. i've been drooling over these brown pumps for a least a year. and so far they have been too expensive for me. why would i spend $80 on a pair of shoes i'll never wear? at least any time soon. being unemployed puts a serious cramp on the style. but they were marked down to $60, and the boyfriend gave me a $40 gift certificate a few months ago. so i figured they were worth spending $20 of my own money on. then i get to the register and they were $25!!!! who knew?!?! i should have. this is why i love that store. awesome shoes for next to nothing. it's even better than dsw. the shoes are higher quality and are cheaper!

don't you love them?

12.27.2009

hockey education

so i think my boyfriend is trying to get me to bone up on my hockey knowledge. actually... i know he's trying to do this. though i might have suggested it.

i've been a fan of hockey for a while. ever since i came across a late night airing of a game when i was in high school. although upon further thought, i used to watch roller hockey games at my friend's roller rink in middle school. even with this early introduction to hockey i never attended a game until my boyfriend (when we were still just friends) got us tickets to a rangers game. i think that totally changed my feelings towards the game. i liked it before. i was drawn to it before. but now i'm in love with it. i love the rough and tumble action, the swiftness with which a player can score, and the crazy die-hard fans.

now i have to stop here and say that the rangers suck, as do their fans. there's no loyalty and no real teamwork. you can tell by watching the game that the only reason these guys are playing for this club is that the paycheck and the city is awesome.

since i moved to chicago, i've become a blackhawks fan. they are an amazing team with incredible promise. the show great love and support for each other. and the fans... they are fans! they are probably the most invested ones in the u.s.a. (i wouldn't speak for canada. they're pretty crazy there.) nothing is ever said against the blackhawks. well maybe there's a "oh, come on!" when they fumble a play, but none of the rangers booing of their own players.

so for christmas my boyfriend got me "hockey for dummies" and "the greatest hockey stories ever told". i'm getting quite an education. "scrum" means a fight or skirmish. which has been the most helpful in reading the greatest book. the dummies book was also helpful in teaching me how to read the stats. something any fan of any sport needs to know. the greatest stories book is a compilation of some of the greatest pieces ever written about hockey. some of them the writer is important, sometimes it's the story, and a lot of them it's the location that is important. it's about hockey all over the world, for all ages, and all types of fans.

we'll see how much better of a fan i become...

winnie-the-pooh

i really want this book... volume... set? i have a version of this treasury. but it's horribly beat up, and in the far away future i'd like to share these stories with my children. my version is really just too dead already; i can't imagine how awful it will be in even 5 years time. and since i can't afford the first edition (and really who would let a child read a $8600 set of four books?!?!?) i would like a replacement of my exact version. i know i'm crazy. i might relent and buy a different printing, but it has to be in this format. i like that it's separated into individual books, exactly as it was originally printed. and i like that the set contains both volumes of a. a. miline's children's poetry. i don't think that poetry versus short story are presented well to children. they never realize that their books all rhyme. when they advance in reading levels they leave poetry behind and move onto the short story, never to return again, but they should. and i think that miline's poetry is a perfect stepping stone. still for children but more literary than 'dick and jane' books.

anyways back to the books themselves. my versions are missing their covers. i've never seen them actually. except for in the pictures online. i'm scared that if i really read them, they'll just fall apart. mine look almost as bad as the ones in the picture. i'll remain on the hunt.


http://www.librarything.com/work/2810262

oliver cromwell

soooo... i just got a late night phone call from my best friend requesting me to tell her step-dad about how awful oliver cromwell was. apparently in a drunken discussion with her large extended family cromwell came up as a topic, and her step-dad had sided with him. no one else in the room agreed with him. and yet my friend needed me to add to the number of people against him. i asked her if he had slept through all of the museums and churches and castles when he had visited ireland, because a lot of them included a small display about how cromwell killed a lot of people, burnt down a lot of buildings, and stole a lot of property. she subsequently decided that i needed to tell him myself. when her step-dad got on the phone, i asked him why he liked oliver cromwell. his response, "i don't like cromwell. well.... i like the name." hahaha well... that ended that argument. i'm sure he was just pressing my friend's buttons. and i'm sure her mom with say something about calling me and interrupting my evening with ridiculousness. but hey, it gave me something to write about.

12.16.2009

time to move on

i'm done for the semester. took my second and last final monday evening. i'm slowly cluing into the rest of my life. i really need to clean the apartment, find a job, and mail my christmas presents. i also need to organize my finances, including paying for next semester.

my roommate is moving to germany for the semester. so we need to find a person to replace him. and negotiate with the management company to lower the rent for the period of time that we can't get someone to replace him. it is assumed that someone would only rent january through may, whereas he will be gone january through august. the utilities have to been changed to my name, and i have to figure out how i'll pay rent for the next few months. i still have savings built up, but i think my life is more expensive than i realize. thus the re-evaluation of my finances.

cleaning also a priority. i'm leaving for a week for christmas, and i know that if i don't do it now it'll never get done. i need to make a list and prioritize. a lot of things to do, so little time. but i have to get things done. time to freak out!

12.10.2009

bad bad blogger!

to catch everyone up (meaning no one. well meaning "catch you up" cuz i only have one follower.) the enormous project i've been working on met its end today. today was presentation day. i finalized the project last night and had the thing bound this morning. then presented at 1pm. all went so so. my teacher was fairly unresponsive, though we got him to laugh a few times, but he gave no critique and asked few questions. i know my grade so far, and i can't imagine completely failing the project, so i think my grade is safe.

the run-up after thanksgiving was definitely mangled. my intention was to have the entire estimate done the monday following t-day, but it wasn't done until the very last minute. finally when my group did meet on this past tuesday, another member and i sat and figured out the powerpoint and the report, while the third member studied for a different class. then we, the one active member and i, met again yesterday so he could give me his printouts. i finalized everything at 11pm last night. this wasn't how the project was supposed to go. (side note: i had done the powerpoint in office 2007, which the presentation computer did not have. then the lab computers wouldn't save it as an earlier version. i got it saved as some other format, which ended up working. what a bad start to the presentation.)

now it is done, and i'm onto studying for the next final. economics. i'm not that worried about it. but i will spend a part of the weekend studying.

11.25.2009

final countdown

so it's very early in the morning the day before thanksgiving. i have one day left. can i accomplish everything?

well... i'm onto a good start. just finished packing and getting together everything. so i can leave for the airport straight from campus. i'm taking my rolly bag (the small one) so that i don't have to lug everything on my shoulder. especially after i get to new york. though now that i'm thinking about it, i might want to spring for a cab. it'll be pretty late when i get in, and i don't want to spend an additional 2 hours waiting for the nyc public transit.

i've given in. i'm bringing the giant roll of plans with me to ny. there's no other way! plus i know i'm not going to get to campus at any sort of ideal hour, so i really need to maximize my time there. and i know i'm not going to use them in ny, but this way i could also go straight from the airport to campus if desired. especially if i still have a lot of work to do.

also i got yelled at by the monitor for eating in the lab. that is the only monitor that has ever said anything to me. he's also the only one who actually checks the labs. and he did it every 15 minutes! what an uptight stickler!!!! i ate anyways. i was hungry!

11.24.2009

holy cow! it's late!

so i'm at it again. more estimating. this is how much time it takes... currently my entire life. i've been poking around, and i just realized that it is almost 5pm. i didn't mean to start so late today. but i did have to stop off at staples to get a memory stick. so tomorrow i won't have to lug my external hard drive to new york as well as the massive set of plans i have next to me. well see how useful the thing is. 2 gigabytes... not bad. i remember when a kilobyte was pretty good. now we've moved onto terabytes(?).

but back to the estimating. i have a lot to do. i picked out all of the sheets i have yet to look at, and there's a lot of them. the ultimate hope is that it will go by quickly. i have the entire architectural section to do. yesterday i established which wall types will ultimately get the exact same amount of materials, and decided to deal with them in these groups. that way i can count more types at once, and establish how much i need of a material much faster. we'll see if this works. wish me luck!

11.23.2009

another one bites the dust

well... almost. currently i only have one more task to finish before i'm done with the structural estimate! hurray! finally! granted it was due a week and a half ago. i'm a bit behind. but once i finish the second floor/high roof i can move onto the architectural estimate, which is what i'm actually concerned about finishing before thanksgiving.

i'm currently in a bind about how much time i have left. i know i'll need to work on it on wednesday, but i also fly out on wednesday. do i come to campus then travel all the way home to drop off the plans and pick up my luggage to then move onto the airport, or do i bring my luggage to campus and subsequently have to take the plans to new york? i'm currently leaning towards taking the plans to new york. because i'm bringing along my laptop and my econ homework and a set of plans and some addition pens won't really add much. plus i can work longer if i don't have to spend an additional 30-45 minutes getting from campus to my apt. but i was schedule myself to the tee, later. right now i need to finish that structural estimate!

11.22.2009

round number eight hundred ninety and...

hitting the plans again in hopes of finishing the structural estimate by tonight. and i'm just starting now. yes i know it's five thirty. i know it's late, but i put in a productive day at home cleaning so i trekked to campus later than i normally do. but i still have hopes. the lab is open until midnight, and i hope that i will take advantage of that. i wanted to do the same yesterday but the energy didn't stick with me. today i brought along lots of snacks, and i intend to eat them all before i leave. and if i stay til pretty late i've given myself permission to order a pizza. which is currently my treat of choice.

but back to the estimate. i have a hefty list of things that need to be accomplished. including: the foundation walls, a concrete topping to the air disbursement system, all of the masonry walls on the first floor, the joists for the low roof and the high roof (yes there are two roofs), the second floor's decking and concrete, the low and high roofing, the support for the chiller, and any louvers included in the building (i think there's a few). so i have a lot to accomplish in six and a half hours. woo me! let's hope i can rock it!

11.20.2009

back in the saddle again

things are going smoothly. which i admit isn't the normal setting for my life. i worked around the ridiculousness of this week and actually accomplished something today. namely the first floor structural estimate for my final project. hurray for me!

to further explain: i'm trying to get my master's degree in construction management. i am currently in a certificate program because my school feels that i need to prove myself before seeking a master's degree. the certificate program entails taking four of the classes required for the master's degree. (in the long run i will be able to apply these classes to my master's.) two of which i'm taking this semester, economics and estimating. and they are worlds apart. one is economics and math, the other is building practices and cost methods. it is for the later class that i've been working so hard (and sometimes not so hard). we have been given a full set of construction documents and the entire specification book and the entire semester to cost the entire project. this isn't particularly hard; it's just ridiculously tedious. counting everything in every square inch of the project. crazy! but i have help. although each of us had to turn in each homework section, only one of us is actually assigned to each section. i allotted myself to the structural and architectural. apparently i am crazy to take on so much. but i have experience in architectural so i don't think that will be as complicated as the structural has turned out to be. oh and have i mentioned that i have to have it all done by thanksgiving! only 6 days away, and i've only cracked the surface. but from doing the other estimates, i've learned that it builds upon itself. once you've done one floor or one quadrant the others fall into place.

so i have hope, and interest, and enthusiasm once again. i'll keep you updated about how it goes.

11.19.2009

craziness

sorry for the lack of posting, but my life has been thrown into complete chaos! first the bf was here to entertain me all weekend, then on monday i got a job interview!!!! hurray hurray!!! except i totally bombed the thing. tuesday because of the interview was a total loss. but on wednesday i got an email asking me to come in for the 2nd interview!!! i guess it didn't go that badly, or more accurately, he just really loves pratt students. i'm now waiting for an email telling em when i should come in for the interview. here's to me not flunking this one!!!

but so now i'm back into the swing of things, more or less. but definitely more productive than i've been for the last week.

countdown til finals has started. i really need to have everything done by thanksgiving. i've started to break my project down to smaller parts so that it isn't as daunting. but if i don't get any of it done each day, i'm practically screwed. so getting nothing done over the last three days has really set me back.

i'll post more later. things are crazy!

11.10.2009

scholarships

why is it so hard to find money for college? it's amazing how skimpy the government can be about educating it's populace. finding many road blocks as i go. even though the government is quite willing to pay my bills (thank you, unemployment) it is unwilling to assist me with my tuition. the hardest issue i have had to deal with is my family. i come from a upper-middle class white family. the money to assist students in my bracket doesn't exist. society assumes that out parents can pay for our tuition for us, but that doesn't ensure that we get the education we want. i have had the luck of being accepted at two of the countries highest rated universities for my studies. that doesn't mean i can afford them. i barely escaped undergrad with only $75,000 in student loans, compared to the 4-year cost of $160,000. the new hurdle is graduate school. with a yearly tuition of $12,000  i won't escape without a mountain of debt on top the mountains i already i have. and most scholarships are next to impossible to qualify for, they assume you have either been to a remote country, or read a rare book, or have a strong opinion about random political ideas. also that people have enough extra time in their day to write a ten-page paper about these things. if an applicant is in school and getting high grades and possibly have a job, there is no time for things like that.

11.09.2009

a job? what's that?

i have to say: thank god i woke up at a reasonable time today! sometime around 11.30 this morning a recruiting company called to ask about the resume i posted on monster.com. not that they have any jobs available at this time. but this means that when things do become available i will one of the people considered for the position! finally things are sort of looking up. as long as they don't crazy pre-interview me. though i guess that's what their clients pay for them to do.

that also makes me feel better about posting my resume online and checking those online job databases. i just need to get in the habit of responding to the posting. this also applies to the scholarship databases. not only do i need a job, i need money for school. i absolutely need to keep plugging away. for a week's worth of energy i've done pretty well. hurray!

11.08.2009

success

i'm always a little jealous when i find out that people in my graduating class are doing extremely well for themselves. i always wonder what exactly i did wrong, but i usually remember how ambitious these people were during school. the other day i came across an acquaintance from school with her own business and webzine. the fact that she is still doing well, even in the shit economy, is a crazy thing. though my memories of her at school  were always of awe. she was an industrial design major and was having her projects professionally produced, so she could sell them. or at least to have an awesome prototype to show retailers. the webzine, designglut.com , is a slew of interviews of people who are leaders and/or innovators in their field. what a wealth of knowledge she has of the production side of design?!? she is also quite a designer. i remember chairs and tables from school projects that were outstanding. and looking at her current work, it isn't lacking any of that vision. my favorite piece is the candlestrip candelabra. the candles plug into the powerstrip-like base!


enthusiasm...

i'm lacking the enthusiasm to do much these days. without being at school i don't really have any urge to do any of my work. i don't want to clean; i don't want to do my hw; i especially don't want to look for a job. where do i get that from. can't buy it. can't create it. i feel like you get enthusiasm from doing something you love, and then it sort of rubs off onto things you aren't as interested in. i'm definitely not doing anything that i love right now. i like grad school. i do like what i'm learning, but the projects aren't pushing me to fully invest myself. and chores... really? who loves doing them? i like the after-effect and i like organizing, but cleaning, i'm not so thrilled about. the last thing, job hunting, that's probably my least favorite activity of the bunch. i have to search out something, anything that pays that i'm qualified to do. that is really motivating.

i've definitely been thinking about it though. i'm definitely more involved in my life when i spend a few hours on campus. i have more direction in my day. and i more willing to do chores when home. it allows me to think of something to do when i wake up. i need to get ready to go to campus. and figure out what i will do when i'm there. if only i could find a convenient way to transport my drawing set to campus the homework situation would be ok. i end up waking up, eating breakfast and showering. then getting my things together and spending a few hours working away on campus. sometimes i get there before lunch, sometimes in the afternoon, but either way it doesn't matter. i end up being more productive in the hours i spend on campus then i would at home. at home i just stare at the work i need to do. on campus i have nothing else to do. when i finally get home, again it varies from 5pm til 9 or 10pm when i'm done with class. either way i'm more interested in picking up after myself and cooking something nice for dinner (even doing the dishes) than i am when i don't go to campus. even if i get home at 10pm. and if i'm not extremely productive in the time i spend there, i'm still more productive than i am at home. so this compels me make the trip to campus as many days a week as possible.

though i am productive on campus, i need to set a regular method of working there. i need to decide how much time i will allow for job hunting, for homework, and for miscellaneous stuff. i'd like to apply for one job a day, but that hasn't been happening. and i'm scared that i will have to revise my portfolio and/or resume too many times and that it will take up too much time. currently too little of my time is spent on homework. a job is important but doing well in my classes is also. i've been spending most of my homework time at home, but that hasn't been working. also i spend a crazy amount of my time at home and at school looking around on the internet, doing random things. how much time i do not know, but it's a lot. i need to allot a certain amount of time for that, which would also include any important updates or emails that need to be sent not related to school or work.

current thoughts on scheduling: spend first minutes checking and sending emails, second period would be trolling job websites and scholarship websites, third would be school work (whatever is specified for that day), fourth would be sending out job/scholarship applications (preferably one a day), and anything else would be used to update my portfolio. so far sounds like a good plan.

but the key is getting my butt to campus almost every day. i've just got to do it!

11.04.2009

big lump of

today i woke up early, 9am that's early in my world, and got going right away. i started my laundry. then i ate breakfast. i did something before eating breakfast! oh my god! then i partook in some news. after watching 30 minutes i decided to watch tv on my computer. i ended up giving up my plan of completing my estimating homework, and decided to catch up on my tv. boo! but oh well, too late now. i've watched a week's worth of tv today. i have refrained from being more than a week behind. now for dinner and some real productivity. i did finish my laundry (almost), i just need to fold and put away. so that, dinner, and some homework (either estimating or economics, i don't have much of a choice).

good luck to me.

my real goal is to wake up early tomorrow as well and maybe get some exercise in. woo yoga! though that depends on the roomie waking up and leaving by an early hour.

11.03.2009

extraordinary machine

happy november!

if there was a better way to go then it would find me
i can't help it, the road just rolls out behind me
be kind to me, or treat me mean
i'll make the most of it, i'm an extraordinary machine
-fiona apple

been stuck in my head for days. enjoy!

10.28.2009

what happened?

i've spent the past three days at school. it's amazing how much you can get done if you aren't at home. i don't even know i how i distracted myself. but being in this computer lab at school has increased my productivity a thousand-fold. i've created two different layouts for my updated resume. and now it's onto updating old projects, something i started months ago. but i hate myself for leaving that at home.

so in reality i am procrastinating by writing this. oh well... too bad. i've done more than i've done for almost three months.

i am in the civil engineering computer lab in alumni hall. it appears that there is never a class in this lab. (awesomeness for me.) but it's always full of people. i think everyone in this department is partial to this lab. that's fine. as long as there's a computer for me. what would make this comuting to school every day better, is if they had somewhere i could store stuff. a locker or something. the school is mostly comuters, i don't know why they don't have something like that for them. i guess there is a comuter lounge and that was a long time coming, so maybe... eventually...

looking back on my work from pratt a lot of it isn't bad. i have more negative memories of it than there probably were. even my work from my one architecture class isn't horrible. i could salvage some of it. yet i've always been under the impression that it was all complete crap and that it almost isn't worth the memory space on my harddrive. why you hold on to everything.

the additional good part about being on campus every day is that it deliniates dinner time and bed time. though when i have class i still am too "stimulated" (to borrow a word from my prof) to go to bed at a reasonable hour. and being on campus on class days makes eating quite complicated.

also in lue of this new ability to be productive, i also have started being more organized at home. putting things away when i use them or when i'm done with them, instead of ignoring the entire mess. (dishes are still a pain, but they always will be.) who knew getting out of the house would help? it's starting to make me rethink wanting to work at home. i think it's a combination of not having a deadline and being at home. i'm not compelled to do anything because there's no deadline i have to work towards. by being out of the house, on campus, i have to fill the time doing something. and my selection of things to do is limited.

let's hope that i keep this up.

10.26.2009

job search

i'm still on the lookout for a new job. i periodically search the web for postings asking for the experience that i have. there aren't any, ever. but i need to get cracking. my unemployment should be stopping soon. and i have NO money. i would also like to buy x-mas gifts, but that's a total fantasy at this point. we'll see, we'll see.

but i bring this up, because i am going to an internship workshop tomorrow. i'm not all that sure what this is supposed to help with, but my hope is that it will assist me in finding a paid internship. who knows?!? the initial concern is does it even apply to me? the next is if i'll even wake up to go. i think with a task at a specific time will get me going. i have to remember to bring my homework with me so i can do it at school instead of home. i don't want to trek there and back twice. i don't know what to do about food... and i should bring my resume and such, just in case. i'm dressing semi-casual, semi-business. one i'm quite good at. the goal is to wake up, call the office to see if i should even bother going, getting ready (if necessary), and going (if necessary). i really need to contact the career management center anyways. i am looking for employment after all. if anything they can tell me over the phone that i should come after the workshop to discuss finding a position, that would be ok too.

please wish me luck. or cross your fingers, or pray. but just good thoughts my way. i'll say how it went tomorrow!

10.24.2009

blackhawks

so i'm going to be a blackhawks fan for halloween. not much of a stretch, i know. but i figured it was the best costume i could come up with using the things i own. to beef up the idea i knew i'd need to buy some stuff from the blackhawks store here in chicago. i own two hats and a vintage jacket (not winter classic vintage, 80s vintage), plus some miscellaneous items. i figured i'd buy a t-shirt and temporary tattoos. at the store i immediately found the shirt i wanted, but i was initially distracted by the mini sticks that they give out to children at the games. if i couldn't find anything else to compliment my outfit, a hockey stick would definitely be the way to go. looking around some more, i couldn't find tattoos or stickers. apparently they do not carry temporary tattoos, though you can sometimes find them at the stadium. they did have stickers, which still wasn't quite what i was looking for, and decals with a thin white border like i wanted. i settled for the decals. my only concern about them is that they'll pull all of my skin off of my face. we'll see.

getting home and trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my day, i found out that the hawks were actually playing tonight. to go to the bar and sport my costume, or not. i ended up deciding no, since i had already spent enough money today on the shirt and stickers. watched the game on the local cable in my new shirt. they beat nashville 2-0. maybe the shirt will bring some luck. even more reason to have bought it. oh no the fan is taking over...

production?

not me. i went grocery shopping. spent a lot less than i normally do. though i did spend way more than i normally do last week. so i guess it just evens out. still spending the same amount.

no homework was finished. no cleaning was done (though the roomie washed the dishes. yeah!) and my life/room is still in chaos. i really need to get s**t together. i did some light job hunting online last night, with nothing really coming out of it. still jobless; still in limbo about school; and still broke as a joke.

the only thing i've accomplished of any use: i figured out my halloween costume. i'm going to be a blackhawks fan. super easy and the few things i plan on buying i'll use again. plus it's my favorite costume - jeans and a t-shirt.

try again tomorrow, with sorting out my life. i need to make a really list of things to do before going to bed tonight. and maybe scheduling them out. that way i feel more determined to get out of bed. which i think has been more of the issue recently.

10.22.2009

mildly improved

so i neatened up a little. i cleaned up my desk, took out my trash, and actually attempted to do something with my day. i procrastinated a lot. when i finally sat down to get some work done, the website i need to do the project wasn't working. so i attempted some of my other homework, eventually giving up on that too.

i ended the day with my new netflix movie. delicatessen. a french film about a post war society that is slowly running out of food. people have become so desperate they have started to eat other people. the whole movie centers around an apartment building owned by a butcher, whose shop is on the first floor. he has an ad in a newspaper asking for a handyman. after they stay about a week, the butcher kills them and distributes the meat amongst the building's residents. main characters are a man who shows up for the position and the butcher's daughter who falls in love with said man.

as french movies go this one was on par. incredibly creepy, but also incredibly endearing, in true french form. the director creates this separate world in which these characters live. i'd liken it to amelie, but with sweeney todd mixed in. this was a definite improvement after m. hulot's holiday (my last netflix movie), which while endearing can be painfully quiet and slow when not expected. i give this movie 4 out of 5 stars.

10.21.2009

complete failure

putting some things away will lighten the load when i go to pick up after myself at the end of the day. this completely solves my problem of being buried under a load of clothes while sleeping, or barely being able to fit my laptop on my desk. we'll see about the dresser. that's the danger zone.

but i'll try this, for a week, and see if it makes any improvement on my life. put things away not down. tidy up before bed, not before breakdown. wish me luck!
i have completely failed to follow these simple rules. at the beginning of this week i decided i needed to clean up my life a little bit. and to put things away constantly instead of after it becomes this crazy mess. even after thinking this through, and really trying for a day or so, my room is still a complete disaster. i blame nancy drew, which i also wrote about earlier. the games are so addicting. and since i refuse to let other addictive things enter my life, video games sometimes fill that void. i've been playing computer games instead of doing my to-dos and have too distracted by them to pick up after myself.

we'll see if tomorrow is an improvement. i'm already better than the last few days. i'm getting into bed soon, reading, then going to sleep. maybe i'll be asleep by 2! that is an improvement!

10.19.2009

nancy drew

boo to mystery computer games late at night. i've just given up on the nancy drew: curse of blackmoor manor online game. it's super spooky, especially late at night. i think the actually creepy parts are the sudden noises and the spooky song the little girl sings over and over and over. i was hoping that i would be able to finish the thing and have a happy ending before i went to bed, but when i realized that it was 3:30 in the morning, i decided sleep was more important. the thing i fear is actually dreaming about the game. i dream about most of what happens in my life, and movies, books, and games can factor heavily into my dreams. not so good when it's about hauntings and/or murders and such. let's hope i sleep well.

10.18.2009

laundry

in general, i like doing laundry. it sucks carrying it up and down the stairs, but for the most part it is really just waiting. 30 minutes for the wash; 45 for the dry. not hard to do. watch some television, prepare meals, do other chores, or if you're lucky, errands. it can be a really productive task.

the difficulty lies in what comes after. the folding, putting away, and the remaking of the bed. all incredibly painful tasks. my mother would probably tell you that i could happily live with my clothes stored in a pile at the foot of my bed. this may have been true when i was 10 or 12 (when my mother still did my laundry including the folding), but i have since grow out of that habit. that's why i keep a chair handy. but really, i do like to have my clothes nicely folded and put away; i just don't like to do it myself. when i sent out my laundry (the beauty of new york) i gladly put away my clothes; granted they were already nicely folded. i just can't muster the energy to fold and put away, after doing the laundry. i'm over the laundry and just want it to be done.

making the bed is worse. if tired enough, i will put off making it and just sleep in the top blanket (only for one night!). but this task could be made easier by having a room that truly fits a queen-sized bed. my bed barely fits; i only have access to one side when making it up. quite a difficult task i hope you know!

but laundry has to be done. i really hate to smell; as i suppose everyone does. though that feeling doesn't overcome my dislike of putting the clean ones away. i'm glaring at my bag of freshly washed garments as i write this. according to my previous post, i am making an effort of put everything away as it presents itself or, at the latest, by the end of the day. well... it's the end of the day and those clothes are just going to have to be put away! and the bed made. and the dishes washed. sheesh... i have a lot of work before bed!

10.17.2009

clutter

i think i'm pretty well organized. i think i have boiled down what i own to the essentials. i think i still have too much stuff. i try to organize, i try to clean, but it never seems to help. i purge (boy do i love a good purge!) and i budget, and nothing seems to help. i'm constantly moving stuff off of my desk, off of my dresser, off of my bed. i even put them away when i move them. and still things collect. it's as if i have a leak somewhere. things slowly seep out onto the surfaces of my room. it appears to be unstoppable.

i know what the solution is. same as i know the solution to my leaky faucet. i need to start at the visible problem. i can try to put things away daily, instead of weekly. but if that doesn't contain the problem, i have to start at the source. i need to make a point to put things back instead of putting them down. i'm too much of a space cadet to really accomplish this feat. but the combination of the two might just work. putting some things away will lighten the load when i go to pick up after myself at the end of the day. this completely solves my problem of being buried under a load of clothes while sleeping, or barely being able to fit my laptop on my desk. we'll see about the dresser. that's the danger zone.

but i'll try this, for a week, and see if it makes any improvement on my life. put things away not down. tidy up before bed, not before breakdown. wish me luck!

holy recovery

i was in need of a complete overhaul of my computer. i knew it would be a lot of work, but who knew? it's still going on. i called toshiba at 5:15pm yesterday. yesterday! and i'm still loading programs and changing settings. every time i restart my computer something else needs to be changed. and every time i go to turn it off there are more updates to be installed. and every time it turns on something pops up that i never want to see or something is displayed. i just want all of my old settings back.

i'm giving up for the day. i'm going to shut down my computer and try again tomorrow. i got my internet going, as you can tell... woo hoo! but the rest will just have to wait.

10.16.2009

cold cold day

and yet i barely noticed it. i spent the day actually doing stuff. and by doing stuff i mean my homework, that i've been procrastinating on for a while. but i sat by my window all day and scarcely noticed the frigid temperatures. until i had to go outside to get to and from class. but still not as bad as expected. the rain let up a little while i traveled. it's going to snow soon. easily before thanksgiving. amy freeze, please don't say there'll be snow til thanksgiving. please. maybe a little prayer about it as well. dear god the snow sucks. please hold off.

not that this rainy windy cold weather is any better.

10.13.2009

two become one

Candle light and soul forever
A dream of you and me together
Say you believe it, say you believe it

Free your mind of doubt and danger
Be for real don't be a stranger
We can achieve it, we can achieve it

Come a little bit closer baby, get it on, get it on
'Cause tonight is the night when two become one

[Chorus:]
I need some love like I never needed love before
(Wanna make love to ya baby)
I had a little love, now I'm back for more
(Wanna make love to ya baby)
Set your spirit free, it's the only way to be

Silly games that you were playing
Empty words we both were saying
Let's work it out boy, let's work it out boy

Once again if we endevour
Love would bring us together
Take it or leave it, take it or leave it

Are you as good as I remember baby, get it on, get it on
'Cause tonight is the night when two become one

[Chorus]

Ah, oh wow
Ah, oh wow

Be a little bit wiser baby, put it on, put it on
'Cause tonight is the night when two become one

I need some love like I never needed love before
(Wanna make love to ya baby)
I had a little love, now I'm back for more
(Wanna make love to ya baby)

I need some love like I never needed love before
(Wanna make love to ya baby)
I had a little love, now I'm back for more
(Wanna make love to ya baby)
Set your spirit free, it's the only way to be

It's the only way to be
It's the only way to be

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

who knew that the spice girls were so explicit? and i was quite young when they were popular; a lot of my friends were fans when they were little. one friend had such a loving feeling from this song she was thinking of playing it at another friend's wedding. i told her it wasn't such a good idea. she initially thought it was more about it being the spice girls than the content. but after talking about another song and it not qualifying because of explicitness of the lyrics, i told her that was why i was against this song. she had no idea. she just thought of it as this romantic song. and thirteen year old girls loved this song! adults are constantly concerned about why girls are starting to have sex younger and younger, but they aren't concerned about to what their children listen.

10.12.2009

reading your reading

it is amazing how what i read inspires me to read more. i was incredibly proud of myself for reading james joyce's ulysses - a definite feat. but nothing makes me happier than to read something that mentions a book i have read. i am currently reading a collection of essays by george orwell, and multiple times he mentions joyce's book. the best mention is in describing something else. for example, in "inside the whale" orwell compares ulysses to henry miller's tropic of cancer. no matter if the comparison is positive or negative (in this case it is positive), it compels me to read the other book. i know what my feelings were about one of the pieces; i want to know if my feelings about the other will be as described. the only drawback is with difficult reads. ulysses is a notoriously hard book to read, and i tackled it without any assistance. if i had previously read tropic of cancer and then read this essay, i think reading ulysses would have been much easier.

it is a nice feeling when a writer is referring to other pieces (novels, songs, art, what have you), and you can say that you know about what they are talking. in another part of this essay orwell mentions two books i have read previously. one of which is wuthering heights. he describes it as a "perverse and morbid book". oh, how true! at that moment, it was like an old woman in a gospel church, "hallelujah!" reading that put me in the author's thoughts, established his point of view, and showed that i agreed with him. which makes me want to follow his recommendations, like reading tropic of cancer.

columbus day

i have today off from school, for fall break. but because i only have two days of class and fall break is during one of them and that day also happens to be columbus day, i keep stating that i have the day off for columbus day.

anyways this shouldn't be particularily impactful since i only have class from 6:30 to 9. i've decided to be especially productive today since i have the day "off". first to shower, very important. then i'm either going to rearrange the kitchen cabinets, while unpacking my kitchen box, or clean the bathroom. both desperately need to be done. the roomie asked me to clean the bathroom about a week ago. and this morning i had a sudden need to have all of my stuff finally put away. we'll see how i do.

also in preparation for class on thursday i really need to do a couple hours of homework. this kindda ruins the "day off" but it needs to be done.

10.10.2009

george orwell

as you know i've been reading a collection of george orwell's essays. today i plowed through three of them. with the help of the weather and my boyfriend's need to have a relaxing weekend. plowed is the wrong word. it gives a connotation of hard work, and it isn't. he is quite amusing, and his ideas are quaint. it is interesting that a lot of his opinions are similar to mine. that should contradict what i wrote earlier about his ideas being "quaint", but i believe i'm pretty old-fashioned. not that i want to go back to the victorian times or become amish, but i feel we've traveled far from where we've started and not necessarily in a good direction.

orwell grew up in a middle-class family, and at the age of 9 or 10 he was sent to a boys boarding school. he wrote about his experiences in his famous essay, the joys of... after that he went to one of the english public schools. he eventually ends up in indian as part of the british police force there. he talks about one of his experiences in the essay shooting the elephant. after leaving the british service, he became a writer and commentator for the bbc. he wrote a few novels in his life; most well known are animal farm and 1984. both commonly read as part of the curriculum in american english classes.

i first encountered george orwell in my junior year of high school. i had to read animal farm as part of my government class. i don't know if i even bought the book. a few years ago i desired to read the "classics", the books everyone supposed to read at one time or another, that i never needed to read. 1984 was consumed during that period. his thoughts about the possibilities of the future are interesting, and still completely plausible. excepting the fact that he dates his book in 1984, which has already passed and the events did not occur, the book was creepy in its possibility. if only someone could reedit the book and place the date in 30--. that will give the world one thousand years to bring his book to life. instead of the 60 years he gave it. that brings another thought: orwell thought that sixty years was enough in the future to make his book plausible. he did not have a lot of hope for the state of the world. neither did his readers. i expect that the world will be much like it is in sixty years, except either more of less countries. i'm leaning towards more. as the small cultural and racial groups within countries vie for power and attention they will succeed at getting their own countries. making the world appear even less like the world orwell creates in his book.

10.09.2009

anyone want to give me $2 million?

upon reading a little more of george orwell, i was struck by something. several times in the book he mentions how amazing it would be if someone had 100,000 pounds. like pounds sterling, the british currency. i thought that was so weird because £100,000 doesn't appear to be a lot of money. but keeping in mind when this was written and the attitude at that time, it is a considerable amount. with £100,000 and an account with 4% interest, which i guess was standard at the time, you would make £4,000 - an amount you could live off of, even with a family. imagine that being able to live off of the interest. not touching the principle, ever. and not having to work. but also imagine being able to live off of £4,000. i don't even know what that amount would need to be currently. though i did figure out what i would need to live that way.

i figured that i'd need $2,000 per month. i currently need $1,500+ a month, but i've figured a little more would allow me to live more comfortably though basically in my current circumstances. so $2,000 a month is $24,000 a year. with the interest on my ing direct savings at 1.3% (and that's better than my citibank account) i'd need $2,000,000 in savings to live the way i do. and i have a roommate, no spouse, and no kids. but i wouldn't have to work... hmmmm... that's a viable option. where to get $2 million?

i need to get a lottery ticket!

*us$2,000,000 is £1,257,937. not so bad. though that's only for single me.*

10.08.2009

estimating

i'm currently working on a project for my estimating class. and it is ridiculous! we have this massive set of plans. and we have to count every little thing. and i mean every last one, and give it a price.

luckily today is preliminary due date. we just have to have a general number. something that we can build off of for our final draft.

the only thing is: i'm a nut-case. i am so detail oriented that i've done almost the whole thing. in two days. well, i've done 50% of the mechanical, which i'm sure is more than most of the students. and mechanical isn't even my section!

my current plan is to stop where i'm at on the mechanical and turn it in. also next week i need to 3.5 hours each day (monday through thursday) working on the electrical, in order to provide my other group member with the same amount of work.

then after that it is all about me. and doing my part of the project. 3.5 hours/day seems like a lot when it comes of my part, but i'll probably need it. we'll see when the time comes.

woo! all i can say is that this thing needs to be done!!!!

10.06.2009

insight of george orwell

a few months ago (prior to my ireland book binge) i decided i needed to read a collection of some famous person's letters or essays. in this vein i bought a collection of essays by george orwell. i had until just recently avoided the book. i just didn't feel up to such serious content. i was mistaken. i've only read three of the essays, and they are far from serious. well... orwell writes seriously about everything, but it's hard to be serious when the topic of discussion is semi-pornographic comic postcards.

the first essay was about his personal boarding school experience. it is interesting in how he dwells on the inner workings of a child's mind, something he is obviously interested in and writes about a lot. the second (much longer) essay was about the writings of charles dickens. i hate everything written by dickens so i mostly read this one in search of something to redeem the author, but i learned nothing that would compel me to read another dickens work.

the third essay is about the semi-pornographic comic postcards i mentioned above. this is where the amusement began. towards the end of the piece he writes about why the working-class appear to be young and beautiful, then suddenly become old and ugly. he writes,"the working classes reach middle age earlier because they accept it earlier. for to look young after, say, thirty is largely a matter of wanting to do so." this appears fairly sound. after a certain age you do have to put forth effort in order to keep the appearance of youth. he goes on, "the impulse to cling to youth at all costs, to attempt to preserve your sexual attraction, to see even in middle age a future for yourself and not merely for your children, is a thing of recent growth and has only precariously established itself." i'd like to point out the "costs" that orwell believes that people are paying for their youthful appearances: "try to stay young at forty by means of physical jerks, cosmetics and avoidance of childbearing." but above all the best part is his conclusion. "[the impulse] will probably disappear again when our standard of living drops and our birthrate rises." too sad to say that never happened. the standard of living never dropped and the birthrate certainly never went up. why would you go from having 13 kids to only having 3, then become willingly have 13 again?!!?

there will be more from this wise man as i continue to read this book. but i think i'll always remember it by his insights on aging and beauty.

10.05.2009

oh, how i wish i could...

nick hornby's new novel was just released! oh, how i wish i could buy it!!!! but alas, it is in hardcover, and i only buy paperbacks. (i only have room for paperbacks.) plus i'm as broke as it gets. bah humbug! i love you, nick hornby!

willie nelson at his best

i let my itunes play what it wanted an this is what it came up with!!!

frank sinatra and willie nelson! duet! a foggy day.

who knew?!?!?!

it made my night.

10.04.2009

halloween

this month contains only one worth while holiday. halloween.

i do enjoy this holiday, mostly because you have to dress up as something creative, but also because it allows you to eat as much candy as possible.

in college this holiday became more about the creativity of your costume and drinking then anything else.

now i'm mostly enthralled by the costumes, and coming up with the best one, then the other stuff.

eventually this will give way to my children's costumes, and subsequently to handing out candy and consuming the leftovers.

but for now i do my best of come up with a one of a kind piece. i transformed a baby's giraffe costume into a top and sported it with jeans. i was "cloudy with a slight chance of rain" taken from real simple. i've been a black cat, in a black cocktail dress with ears and tail.

this year i have nothing. i don't even know what i'm going to do that night. it is a saturday. that brings out multiple possiblities. no matter what i'll be something awesome!

10.02.2009

happy autumn!

first day of october.... well the second day.

i have a renewed feeling. like everything is lighter. everything is easier. everything is better. but i know it isn't any different. i just feel different. but it's nice. i don't mind wallowing in it for a bit.

things are going smoothly. i'm getting things done. it feels good.

i'm still having difficulties waking up at a reasonable hour, or more truthfully getting out of bed at a reasonable hour, but i'll manage. i have high hopes for tomorrow. you never know though.

i'm planning a trip to target... duh duh duh. it's so bad going there. i want everything and can't buy anything. it's difficult. but go there i must. i have my list, and hopefully i stick to it. i might scope out bedding and drapery. i'm in need. oh and a christmas tree. there're only $30; i don't think they'll get any cheaper.

hahaha it isn't even halloween and i'm thinking about christmas.

9.29.2009

exhaustion

well i finished painting my room... a week ago! but i've been so exhausted from the undertaking of it all that i haven't been able to anything for a week. plus i caught a cold in my thursday class, and the bf came in town on friday. so i've been thinking of everything except the things i really need to get done.

my bf left yesterday morning at the crack of dawn (in my version of time). and i laid in bed all day imagining that it was helping my cold to go away. i woke up and started thinking about what needed to get done. i was under the impression that my monday's homework was due after two weeks, but i wasn't sure. so i rechecked the website. teachers like to just change these things. and he had! the homework was due that night and i hadn't even looked at it!!! and i took one look at it and realized that there was no way i'd ever get any of it done by class. so i took a swing at the first two problems and i couldn't figure them out. so i gave in for the whole thing. just went to class without it. i guess i was right though. the homework was posted to be done in two weeks and someone changed it. enough of the class was unprepared so he gave us an extension.

today i woke up feeling better. mildly. but after organized all of my important documents last night, i actually felt like going through my finances. nothing is as depressing as going over your finances for a four month period. i thought i only had to deal with three, but i was wrong. june still had to be tangled with. but i did one month at a time, with computer games and tv in between. i knew i spent a lot of money in july (i was prepping to go to ireland) and in august (i was in ireland), but that was on top of all of my usual ridiculous spending. ouch! i survived. though now i know why i'm so damn broke!

to round out my productiveness today, i unpacked three of my leftover boxes from moving. and rearranged the drawings for my final project. the ta included in the print-outs the drawings prior to revision. ie one drawing said "do not use. see revision." and the next page was the same drawing but with the revisions. now why would i need those previous pages??? it's just a waste of paper and adds a lot of weight to the already massive set of drawings. they lost 3/4" when i removed those pages. yeah me!

i did all of this while recovering from this crappy cold. and after a week plus of inactivity. i feel pretty good about myself.

i haven't touched that homework yet, but i have some more time. soon enough.

9.20.2009

painting

wall 2 is done. i injured my elbow and my knee, both on the left side. the elbow stings, and the knee has this nasty-looking bruise on it. both were caused by the ladder. i also have little spots of green paint all over me. i haven't looked in a mirror; i might have it all over my face as well. but i feel good. i like the color more than i expected. plus i'm halfway done. more than halfway i'd actually say. i did the longest wall that had no doors or windows. so it had more square footage than the others.

the next wall is the closet wall. i only have to tape at the top and bottom, and i'll free-hand around the door. there's no trim or door -- just an opening -- so it's pretty easy. wall 4 is the door wall. it'll be the hardest to tape. going around the trim of the door, especially since it isn't flat. there is a wire that runs along all of the trim. but the wall is shorter than the others. there is a bump-out for the vent. and since i decided to not paint the bump-out i don't have to go around the vent opening. i thought painting it would make my room seem smaller. it would pull that wall in and shrink the entire space.

now all i have to do for the rest of today is move my furniture around in preparation for painting tomorrow.

... and my homework for my economic class.

9.19.2009

talk about accomplishment!

i've finally decided to paint my room. i was supposed to paint it before i moved in but that didn't work out (do to lack of funds). but today was the day!!!! a few days ago i finally decided on the lighter of the two colors i had swatched all over my walls. then yesterday i trekked to home depot to get my prepping supplies. i bought painter's tape. i completely forgot about the spackle and the trowel. and last night i got incredibly drunk so this morning was a no-go. but by lunchtime i was on my way to home depot to pick up my paint! i got everything i needed and more, spent more than i planned to, and walked it all home. that took all of the energy i had so i slowly started to organize myself and to prep. i moved my furniture out of the way, used my new ladder to tape the window sill, trim, and ceiling, and washed down the wall. i even had to spackle some nail holes. all this took some time and the last of my energy. so i took a break and made a sandwich. when i finally started painting it was 5.30pm, and getting dark. two coats of paint only took me two hours! not bad, not bad. also i only painted one wall. i was going to paint one wall each weekend and take a whole month to paint my room, but painting was so quick that i might just press through and finish it this week. painting a wall a day. we'll see how that goes. but right now i'm reveling in my sense of accomplishment. woo me!

9.18.2009

accomplishment

everyone loves the feeling of accomplishment. to have accomplished your dream, or finally finishing a project you've started, or doing something that you love. it's a great feeling. i love that feeling so much. and i experience it so little. at least i think i do.

i've learned to make lists. i love checking off items one by one. i have a horrible habit of starting things that i never finish. i really need the deadline to be someone else's in order to finish things. but i've learned that about myself; i've accepted it. and i try to work around it. i know i need small projects, small steps. i get that feeling every time i accomplish anything, so i know that if i even finish part of the whole i feel good. i also know it feels better the larger the accomplishment. so smalls steps to the big picture works the best for me.

the other problem i have is starting. to bring myself to start a project from a blank canvas is very hard for me. if it can be anything i want it to be, that ends up being too much of a challenge. my solution for that is to determine if i really want it. if i do, i go for it. if i don't, i'll just putter around about it, then let it die its slow death.

passion, that's the real key to it all. to be so passionate about something that it carries you straight through. it compels you to begin. it gives you that second wind when things seem their hardest. and it guarantees a solid finish. all you need is passion. then comes accomplishment.

library

i love books. i love the look of them, the smell of them, everything about them. their covers, their type, their words. i love reading books, looking through them, and at them. i love fiction, nonfiction, plays, and poetry. i love drama, fantasy, education, and whimsy. i love children's books; i love classics.

i love to read.

i have cookbooks, anthologies, photo books, and comic books. i have every book written by my favorite authors. i have every book written by a one hit wonder. i have workout books, cleaning books, finance books, and medical books. i have more books than i have space. i have library books, textbooks, and sketchbooks. i have notebooks galore. i even have test prep books.

i read essays and poems and stories and novellas and novels and plays and series. i read non-fiction that's fiction, and fiction that's biographical. i read everything.

besides biographies and histories. not after marie anoinette. she killed me.

9.15.2009

silver lining

they always tell you when bad things happen --or when you hit a stream of bad luck-- to look at the silver lining. i'm pretty good at doing exactly that. i'm a pretty positive person; i'd describe myself as a optimistic realist. i get the bad and i know it's bad, but i always have a little hope, a little luck.

for the past week, i've had to deal with this exact situation. on was down on my luck and things could not look any darker. my unemployment was suspended, upon interview, my dad seemingly refused to cosign my student loan, and my $150 textbook had disappeared into thin air. and things were not looking up. with homework deadlines, piling of boxes and crap everywhere, and absolutely NO money, my life was slowly imploding. i even told my boyfriend that i thought my luck had run out.

normally i'm the luckiest person around. things just fall into my lap. and they ALWAYS work out in my favor. and i acknowledge this. my luck has pulled me through some tight spots before, but i've never experienced shit like this.

the first thing to fall into place was my student loan. my dad pulled through in the end, after a practically deadly interview with him. whew! i can actually pay for grad school now. then it was my monday class. the homework was done, and the class was enjoyable. i think i like it more than my thursday class. i've also vowed to spend more time on the homework. it's a bit crazy!

next was my unemployment. i apparently got a letter telling me that i need to call and set up an interview time. they sent it to my friend's place, and i wasn't able to get it until yesterday. i was frantically calling all morning as today was the deadline.i couldn't get through for more than 2 hours. finally i get a woman on the phone. all she needed to know was that my classes are at night and she released the hold on my unemployment!!!! so immediately afterwards i called and confirmed my past two weeks of unemployment and i'll get 4 weeks of unemployment this thursday!

the final kicker was getting my other textbooks in the mail. thank you usps! you rock! ups, you still suck. but these textbooks were just in time for me to do my homework that was due today! talk about meeting a deadline!

luck has maintained! i've never figured it out. my luck, that is. i always say that my either the luckiest or the most blessed. i am a believer, but i've never been able to believe that god is watching me every moment and allowing things to go my way, all the time. and i am almost 100% irish, so i commonly refer to my good fortunes as the luck of the irish. but i'm not sure if i fully believe in luck either.

whatever it is god bless the irish for it!

9.14.2009

a new day

i was quite organized today. as you know, the past few weeks i've been not myself. really in a messy state at all times. but today i was brilliantly organized. more than to-the-tee. everything i needed to get done today has been done. (not including by homework that is due tomorrow, but that'll get done tonight.) and earlier than needed. i scheduled out my day. i think that's the best way to go. it makes me freak out a little about getting a lot done in a little amount of time. this method only works when there are pressing things that need to get done. but because of the schedule, i woke up earlier than i normally would and earlier than i had planned. starting the whole day on the right foot.

i might try this tactic tomorrow as well. we'll see, we'll see. i don't really know what all i need to do tomorrow, or even this week. i'm still a bit scattered, but i think i'll be reasonably productive this week.

i need to allow myself some bit of dream time, where i can just float off into nowhere which i do from time to time, without damping my energies for the day. i should also do a few problems every day for my economic class, instead of in large blocks. trying to do thirteen problems at once was too taxiing.

something that is totally leading my life into craziness is being a group leader for my estimating class. if i could get one more member, i'd feel better about the whole thing. but i'm still short one. and everyone's emails about the groups are completely ridiculous. and are causing me to go insane.

9.08.2009

still a mess

i'm all over the place. i just moved, as in this past saturday, and there are boxes everywhere and stuff everywhere. i pretended to unpack. but i haven't set-up half of my storage spaces so there's nowhere for the stuff to go. i have to change my address for all of my mail. oh and send out my change of address cards to my family and friends. then there's school. paying for it. doing the homework for it. i need to clean. do laundry. rearrange my bed. and organize my kitchen stuff. i've set-up my electronics so i can apply for jobs, if i can find jobs to apply for. my books are all over. as are my toiletries. there are all these improvements that i want to do to the apartment to make it usable but i have no money (and i mean no money!) to do any of it with. i'm still planning on painting, but no money and furniture are in my way.

argh!!!!! i just need to get stuff done! but where to start?!?!?!

9.03.2009

oh how i wish...

if i could somehow get a job (or a tv show) where i got to tell people what was wrong (or right) about their outfits, i would be the happiest person! i am constantly surprised that people can dress so poorly.

for example, today on the bus there was a guy in jean shorts, a gray polo, and black tennis shoes. not so bad, but his socks were this odd nude or oatmeal color. wtf?!?! who knew? i really didn't know they made socks in that color! all i know is that someone should tell him to never let those socks see the light of day again. and i would love to do it. though i lack the guts to do it without some sort of institution behind me, like tlc, or the new yorker.

because some people will think that i'll just rip people apart, i also want to tell some people what is so refreshing about their outfits. some people do dress well and should be acknowledged for it. some times when i come up with the perfect outfit, i'd like someone to compliment me on it. but there is no one.

zzzzzzzz

can't fall asleep........ i was counting to 100 over and over, which normally works. no-go. and then i gave up and was playing solitare for a while. now i'm going to try again. we'll see.

night

9.02.2009

not as easy as it looks

i decided to start my homework last night. mind you that it isn't due until sept 14th. this is pretty good of me. i usually procrastinate more. but i knew there were a lot of problems to be done and i didn't understand the lecture at all, so the homework would be difficult.

boy was it difficult! i got to problem 11 and i needed the 8th root of a number. like any calculator does that! after some searching and multiple tries i found out that if you use the inverse (1/8) as the exponent it does the same exact thing! who knew!

then i moved onto the 12th problem. i looked at it and read it at least a million times. i didn't know what i needed to do. i picked out one equation, then decided against it. i figured out a figure by using another equation, but i was supposed to insert it into another equation. but looking at my original work i questioned if i even needed to. but then i realized that i had used the incorrect interest rate. holy mother! i didn't think it would be this hard!!! good thing i started early!

it doesn't help that i don't have my fancy calculator, or the book that would keep me from doing all of this hard math.

9.01.2009

i'm a mess

i wouldn't say that too often about myself. but that's how i feel today. there's stuff everywhere. i'm moving again in 4 days. and there's plenty of things i need to get done before then. plus some other things i've just got myself into. a few art projects. plus i need to find that perfect job still. what the fuck...

to do (and i'm going to number that shit by importance)
1. call IDES
2. shower/dressed
3. clean off bed
4. take out trash
5. go to post office
6. go to New West
7. get cash
8. lunch
9. homework situation
10. magnet 4 boyfriend
...plus much more. that isn't important enough to be done today.

i wish that made me feel better.

8.31.2009

happy birthday mom

today is my mom's bday. there was a short span of time (of about 2 years) that i would forget her bday. but now i am the perfect daughter. i sent a gift bought while i was in ireland, a christmas ornament from ireland that was requested by her, and a card separate from the gift (cuz i'm not together enough to have the card when i sent the gift). and i called her. woo me!

but otherwise i've been a bit off recently. i can't remember anything past 30 minutes. and things just slip through my fingers. including my cell phone, which i lost this weekend. i rushed home and hoped that someone was online that could call my cell phone. i was in luck; of all people my brother was online. i had him call my cell phone, and when there was no answer i had him call my dad so he could inform the cell phone company.

i tried later that night to call my cell with my friend's phone, but it gave me a message that the phone i was calling was disconnected (my dad's doing).

in order to contact the bus service about your missing item, you have to look up which bus you were on and what its terminal is. then you have to call that specific terminal. i was on two different buses that day. so i have to deal with two different bus terminals' lost and founds. also i knew calling before the bus driver's shift was over was pointless. they wouldn't place the phone in the lost and found til they were done. and also that calling on sunday would be a bust.

so this morning i decided to deal with the bus service. first i had to figure out a way to call them. with no phone and no idea where i could get one, i decided to sign up for skype. my boyfriend uses their service to call internationally, but i knew that you could call anywhere from anywhere using your internet connection. woo hoo! phone service! it worked wonderfully.

first i called the division bus. no luck. though the guy on the phone was nice. then i called the broadway bus. the woman was not listening at all. she kept having me repeat my information, and put me on hold numerous times. but she came back on the line and said she had my phone!!! i still didn't want to get my hopes up. i've seen my phone all over the place. it could just be someone else's or a completely different model that looks like mine.

but in order to even look at the phone i had to trek all the way to that bus depot. it took an hour and 30 minutes there and back. 3 hours to look at a phone. but it was mine!!! who knew that you could actually retrieve lost cell phones!

8.27.2009

2nd day of class

it's pretty ridiculous, but i'm here 2 hours early. that's pretty bad. but what's worse is that everyone else is too. what do they think is going to happen? that class will start an hour early, just by chance. who would do that? everyone's in the room, settling in for class. don't they have better things to do with their time? i would except i wasn't able to accomplish all my errands, so i got campus earlier than expected.

these buildings creep me out too. they're all 3 floors. basement, 1, and 2. i'm not quite sure how they contain all of the classes that need to happen for all of the majors that they teach here. but my class on monday was more than 50 people (the entirety of my undergraduate class). so i guess that explains it. they favor large lecture classes. this class is in an auditorium. god knows how many students are in the class. weird/nice to have such classes. i kindda felt i missed out in undergrad, not having this type of class. but then why wouldn't i want individualized attention for the amount of money i'm spending?!?

this didn't take as much time as i had hoped. i still have more than an hour to kill. though i do plan on entering the class in 20 minutes. then the hope is that the teacher does show up and start early. who knows?

8.26.2009

technology

it very weird but my friends rely on my understanding of technology. and i don't even know that much. i guess people rely on my opinion about most purchases. but the technology thing has gone to another level. my friends now ask how to fix their electronics. like i know anything! i broke my ipod after just a few years! it just stopped working! well actually i think the hard drive died. i dropped it one too many times.

but i guess i'm more directed. i know what works and i start there. then i figure out what are the extras. what is what. it's pretty easy. but i guess everyone else gets so overwhelmed, they can't make a decision.

the other thing: fixing electronics. all i do is google. more often then not other people have had the same problem. and the key is to google more than one thing. usually a helpful solution is on the first page. just keep searching until you find something.

sometimes i don't even find a solution. and i have to give up. i always try again later. sometimes you just aren't searching for the right thing. and you think of something better later.

that's all the secret behind my apparently extraordinary technological skills.

8.25.2009

returning to school

i had some small concerns before starting my first class of graduate school. would all of the students be professionals? would it be all men and just a few women? what would be expected of me? would it be hard? would i even like it?

i am returning to school of my own accord. i have always wanted to return to school, and since i was laid off in the fall this was the perfect time to do it. so that influences my attitude a bit. i'm a pretty carefree or 'whatever' person anyways and i think knowing i'm in school because i want to be there changes my attitude towards it. though i am still 'whatever', i also know i need to absorb as much information as i can. i think taking time off and realizing i'm nowhere near where i want to be in life helps me every day. i strive to make my life and myself exactly what i want.

well the first day was non-eventful. i showed up super early. quickly realized that the building i thought the class was in, wasn't actually it. i had to kill almost an hour and a half before even heading into the classroom. then there were already people standing around and sitting in the room. i headed in when there was still 30 minutes before the class began. i think my major concern was the amount of women in the class. for a bit there it looked like it wouldn't be too big of a difference. but by the start of class, there were 15 girls and 50 people total in the class. we're a bit out numbered.

the class was ok. my professor was a little dry but he tried an amusing tidbit here and there to liven up the class. no one laughed or smiled but me. i ended up taking 6 pages of notes! i'm not sure if that was ridiculous, but it was only the introduction! who knows how many pages i'll take when something important is actually discussed?!?

i survived the class and am preparing myself for thursday's. we'll see about that one.

texas

so i went to texas. at the urging of my boyfriend.

he wanted to do a cross-country train trip, encompassing two weeks and multiple stops throughout the country. but i had to plan my ireland trip during the two weeks he had designated for it. so he cropped his train trip into a tour of texas and requested that i tag along.

he started for texas the day i got back from ireland. first he flew to el paso. renting a car, he drove to an artist community a few hours south of el paso. then he drove back through el paso and continued an hour north to the white sands national park. all of this took 2+ days. he then returned the car and caught the train in el paso. the train from el paso to san antonio took about 13 hours. with plenty of desert to view.

in san antonio he went to see the alamo, the riverwalk, and other random sights that were suggested to him, by locals. his second day there he met up with his friend from austin, armando. after a little sightseeing with him, they drove up to austin.

then next day i flew in the meet up with them. we went and got the best tacos ever before venturing to the capitol. the capitol building in austin is ridiculous! it's on lavish grounds and screams texas. they recently renovated so the whole place looked amazing, plus there is a newer addition that is completely underground (so as to not ruin the view of the capitol building). the light fixtures said 'texas' in light bulbs. and everything had a five-point star on it. even the door hinges were engraved with 'texas capitol' on them. we thought we were just going to poke into the lobby and take a cursory look around, but we chanced upon the tour and were given a full texas history lesson. by a very amusing and very texan lady.

next we went to the infamous 6th st. it is bar after bar after bar; we were too full and it was too early to partake in any of it though. we popped into a few shops and got some italian ice. we then went to congress (st or ave, who knows?). and went into a few shops there, mostly to pass the time. we went back to my boyfriend's friends' and had a swim. nothing beats diving into a cold pool in 100 degree weather. armando and his wife liz took us to a restaurant called chuy's. it was delicious! i got blue corn tortilla enchiladas that weren't really enchiladas. it was more like mexican lasagna. we went back to their house and had a wine and cheese tasting. (liz works as a food writer, and needed to finish up and article about the products.)

the next day we drove out to the outskirts of austin and ate lunch at this riverside hamburger hut. we sat for hours while eating and chatting. afterward we went again to congress. this time to actually shop. i ended up buying some gifts at turquoise ... and at the boot place. my boyfriend finally decided on a pair of cowboy boots he wanted. we also got a gift for our hosts. a quick stop at sonic for some cherry lime deliciousness, then we made our way back to their home. after some napping/chilling out/digesting we decided to go to dinner. but first a stop to watch the congress bridge bats. apparently every summer a breed of bats comes to austin and settles underneath this bridge to raise their young. every night at sunset they emerge en-masse to go feed. it's pretty crazy. after 30+ minutes of watching them emerge, we walked to dinner. it was this fancy-ish french bistro. good but had one of those menus that you stare at for a while and still can't come up with something you want. and not from the large selection of food.

the next morning was our train so after a quick stop at whole foods for breakfast we went to the train station. promptly at 9:30 we departed austin for dallas. the train for this part of the trip was nice. there's lots of legroom and plenty to see. i think i even napped a little. we were in dallas by 3 that afternoon. we checked into the hotel then set off in search of a citibank atm. then we had to search for food. we had decided to have a large afternoon meal to offset the time of the train travel. we randomly landed on sonny's. it's definitely a lunch place with pulled meats galore. my boyfriend wanted to see the location of the jfk assassination and we went to see it and found that there was a museum at the location and that it was still open. that was how we spent the afternoon. i now have an incredible amount of pity for jackie kennedy.

friday we spent in fort worth. we caught the commuter train early in the morning. we very quickly got to the kimball art museum (to find that it opens at 11am on fridays). so we went to the modern art museum first (it's right across the street). i have to say that i love tadao ando! what he does with concrete is amazing! the light and the glass and the concrete. all utterly amazing! and with snazzy detailing! i'm so happy to know about him. also the museum's collection wasn't bad. the collection is small, but the museum is appropriately sized. i don't think fort worth could support a larger museum.

then the kimball. and i thought the modern was small! it had a film exhibition going on, based off of the museum's collection. it was interesting, but i was only compelled to see two out of four movies. and the collection is an array of lesser known pieces by famous artists. so nothing was particularly compelling. we really only went because it was free and my boyfriend really wanted to see the building. it was also done by someone famous. i was unimpressed by the building so i do not recall who designed it.

that night we went out to a burger place suggested by my boyfriend's friend liz. apparently they make everything from scratch, including the ketchup, mustard, and bbq sauce. we got there and it was packed. halfway through the line we thought we had come at the busiest point, but by the time we had sat down the line was twice as long as when we came in. i was slightly scared cuz i didn't see turkey burgers on the menu and we had walked pretty far to get there for me to not be able to eat anything. but upon perusal of the menu they did indeed offer turkey burgers. and they also offered fried green beans. if you have never had a fried green bean , you have no idea what you're missing out on. it was easily the best green bean i've ever had. it's fried and delicious, but still tastes like green bean so you still feel like it's healthy. mmm mmmmm good!

we finished the night off with a nightcap at a mexican place closer to our hotel. where i had the worst gin and tonic of my life. the bartender asked about it and i think my direct quote is "there is something seriously wrong with this gin and tonic." hahaha he wanted to blame the tonic, but it was fine (as i discovered from a tasting). it had to be the gin. lesson learned. don't order well gin.

the next morning we toured the arts district in dallas. everything is sectioned off there. like the government actually decides the neighborhoods and their contents. deep ellum is the dive bar area (where the hamburger place was), west ... was the warehouse district, and the arts district had all of the museums and the theaters. it's super creepy. but so the boyfriend wanted to see the new rem koolhaas building. which is apparently a theater still under construction. it looks like it's a monster about ready to eat you. complete with spiky teeth. not my favorite. plus it's nickname is 'the cube' and it would be a cube except for some unfortunate bump outs in two of the faces.

after walking around this district we made our way over to sonny's again to eat at the chipotle across the street. then an additional trip to the jfk assassination museum to browse the gift shop. then it was time to catch the train again.

this time we had a sleeper room. it had two seat in it, which folded into a bed for one. and an additional bed folded down from the wall. it was nice because we had real beds to sleep on and all of the meals were free. amtrak food surprisingly isn't bad. i had pasta for dinner, really it was manicotti, and an omelet for breakfast. it was really nice to watch the country pass by. we sat in our room for a while then moved to the lounge car for a change of scenery before dinner. then we had such an entertaining dinner companion that we sat in the dining car for 2.5 hours. off to bed after that. then the next morning i just caught the end of the breakfast service. then we sat in our room for a little bit (i napped). at some point we moved to the lounge car in search of some lunch (the lunch service was abbreviated and was too close to our breakfast time so we skipped it.) i napped some more between watching illinois roll by.

i have to say that traveling by train is quite a relaxing way to travel. especially if it's a long trip overnight. to be able to saunter on then off the train, be catered to in the way we wish airlines still did, and sleep soundly through several hours of the trip while actually lying horizontal, instead of being in a stiff chair. woo! it was amazing!

now i'm back and starting school. (started, but i'll write about that later.)

8.17.2009

ireland

i just spent the last two weeks in ireland. thanks to my best friend's parents.

my trip started on the 2nd of august. i was supposed to fly from chicago to toronto, meet up with my friend there and then fly onto dublin. of course that didn't work out. i ended up flying to frankfurt, from frankfurt to london, and finally from london to dublin. arriving 12 hours late. the flight ended up being uneventful, though the customs at heathrow was awful. the guy was a complete dick and i was already exhausted and irritated by my 4 hour debacle with the airline the previous day. customs in dublin was a breeze.

after arriving in dublin, and finding that my luggage was lost in my travels, i went to the hostel and met up with my friend. i found her asleep. we quickly went out for food and returned to the hostel for some much needed sleep.

the next day, we decided to take the hop-on and hop-off bus to get to some of the sites we wanted to see. first stop was the guinness storehouse. they have a self-guided tour through the place. the no longer brew there, although they do still bottle. the had a tasting on the third floor. and you could learn how to pour the perfect pint on the fifth floor. i poured quite a nice one and have a certificate proving i was taught the correct method. the infinity bar is on the roof of the building and is a recent expansion. it is the highest building in dublin. and you can see a full 360 degrees. the second stop was the jameson brewery. they have a guided tour and a tasting at the end. 8 people were chosen to participate, and my friend was one of them. the rest of the tour was given a choice of what kind of drink we'd like. i guess jameson has finally acknowledged that people like to drink their whiskey with other stuff. it was an amusing tour. the rest of the evening was spent wandering around. we ended up visiting the christ church. that night we were so tired that we ate dinner then went to bed.

day 3: our hop-on and hop-off bus tickets were still valid so we got on and took the full tour. this time we picked the route that went past st. patrick's. we did the full loop and more getting off at trinity college. we wandered around the campus. it's ridiculous. a whole host of new and old buildings. connected in weird ways and not in any sort of order. afterwards we went shopping, as my luggage had still not appeared and i was sick of wearing the same clothes day after day. ended up being pointless as my luggage was at the hostel when we got back from shopping. that night we finally had the energy to go out. we went to the smallest pub in dublin (it's the size of a walk-in closet), a pub called mckoe's which had a good after-work crowd, temple bar (which is the most famous bar in dublin), and fitzsimmon's down the block from temple bar.

day 4: we took a mid-morning train to kilkenny which is southwest of dublin, halfway to cork. my friend had booked a hostel. when we found it we were told that it was actually being renovated and we were placed in a different hostel in a different part of town. this place was sketchy. we were in a room in the attic. there was only one other person staying there. as it was mid-afternoon and we didn't know how long we were going to stay in town, we rushed out to go see the sights. the church was old and had some interesting stained glass and tombs. kilkenny castle was nice but had been renovated with, i think, little accuracy. then we went to the design center which in the stables of the castle. the guy who ran our hostel informed us that there was a stretch of 6 or so pubs all in a row and is in the guinness book of world records as being the most bars in a row. My friend set her sights on going to all of them that night. as the other tenant of the hostel was a young woman, we invited her along. we ended up hitting up 3 of them by the time it was midnight and closing.

day 5: we had intentions of going to the kilkenny brewery, but we didn't know how to get to our next stop wexford or what time we would need to leave. so first stop was the tourist information. they were unhelpful, so we had to go down to the train station. we found out that we needed to take the next train which was in an hour. we rushed back to the hostel and then back to the station with our luggage. so no brewery. but train times afforded us with a couple of hours to kill in waterford. so we went to the cathedral and the friary. we also visited reginald's tower, what's left of the old fortifications. we arrived in wexford that evening with no reservations for a hostel. we wandered almost to the edge of town and then cut back into the town. we were able to get a room in the the first b&b we came across. it was really nice compared to the sketchy place we had stayed at in kilkenny. plus there was a pub right next door. we were tired from running around with our luggage, but we had time to kill so we wandered around town. we ended up at the pub next door.

day 6: when i had originally read about wexford it sounded like there was a lot to do. but upon further reading i realized that much of that stuff was outside of town. we had seen some of the stuff when we had wandered the night before. we found out from some locals that there was this ruinous abbey that was locked up. we were told to contact some guy named murray. we found the site but couldn't find murray. we gave up and went to the tourist information and they told us that the organization that looked after the abbey had just stopped doing it. but they told us of this historical irish park that was just outside of town. "a 45 minute walk". they didn't inform us that it was mostly uphill, further than 45 minutes, there's almost no sidewalk, and you'd have to cross a highway to get there. the park was interesting though. a little too recreated, but at least there weren't people walking around in costume. afterwards we returned to town by cab, picked up our luggage and walked to the train station. we took the train back to dublin for a night stopover. we ventured out to mckoe's again.

day 7: we took the direct morning train to galway. immediately went to the tourist information office. we were directed to our hostel and given a lot of information about the tours to do in the area. after going to hostel we decided we wanted to do both tours but we only had one day, so we went back to the tourist info. he told us there was no way to do both tours in one day, but we could go to the aran islands and experience a little bit of both. the best way to do this is by bike. i haven't ridden a bike in years. but it sounded good so i agreed to the trip. we got our tickets and went to a pub for food, drinks, and sports.

day 8: we woke early to catch the bus to the ferry to the island. we got there a little later than planned. got our bikes and started out. as i said before i haven't ridden a bike in forever and i've never ridden a mountain bike. my friend gave me a tutorial in bike gears and we set out. i unfortunately didn't understand the lesson and had my bike on the highest gear trying to go up the steepest mountain. i was dead before we got the top. i had to get off twice to walk my bike. but i soon found out my mistake and switched gears to the lowest. and kept it there the rest of the time. we didn't go to the top of the peak or the most famous site but we did get out pretty far and the island was so pretty that we saw a lot anyways. but boy were we exhausted by the end of it! we did a bit of shopping while there. i got a stuffed animal sheep that i fell in love with halfway across the island. and a beautiful blanket for my mother. plus we had time to kill before taking the ferry back so we got some food. i finally got some fish and chips which were delicious! we were trying to get an earlier ferry as we had finished sooner than we had expected. but they wouldn't take anyone not for the current ferry. they had us wait in line for if there was room. they let some us on and stopped at the large family in front of us. the guy said they would take two more. and before the family could decide if they wanted to separate or not my friend and i had volunteered ourselves for those spots. we got back to the hostel and immediately passed out for the night.

day 9: we took the train in the morning to athlone to meet up with paddy who was to drive us to the remains of an old church. paddy was awesome! he sang for us and told us a bunch of extra tidbits. plus nothing beats a private car to tourist spots. we took an afternoon train to dublin, and rushed to the other train station to catch the evening train to belfast. the hostel in belfast was sketchy, in a different way than the one in kilkenny. the one in kilkenny was bad because of how small it was; this one was sketch for how large it was. my friend said it reminded her to tyler durden's house in fight club. the manager (or the night porter, whoever he was) sent us across town to get food. we ended up at this indian place. delicious! the irish definitely know how to do indian food. then to bed after the long day of traveling.

day 10: first stop was the tourist office. we really had hit and miss luck with the tourist offices. but towards the end of the trip our luck was good. they hooked us up with a hop-on and hop-off tour and bus tickets for a tour of the northern coast and the giant's causeway. we moved into a different hostel. it was new so it was really nice but they still haven't worked out some of the base business parts. like identifying who works there and who is staying there. we dropped of our luggage and went to find the bus tour. we got and it was interesting. belfast is such a weird city, because they were in turmoil until just 30 years ago. they call it "the troubles". like it was nothing. there's still so much left from that time but the residents are obviously trying to work past it. my friend saw some things on the bus tour that she wanted to visit but we weren't sure if it was safe enough to get off, or to go back. upon returning to our hostel though, we were informed that one woman staying there wanted to do a black cab tour. since we had just done a tour we were hesitant. but we were told that it was quite interesting and was specifically about the political history and "the troubles" of belfast. and that it was a private tour. we agreed to go. paddy was our driver. he was incredibly interesting. and took us to all of the sites and more that my friend was most interested in seeing. he was an older gentleman and catholic so his views were quite biased, but it was interesting none the less. there are murals everywhere in belfast honoring someone or memorializing occasions during "the troubles". after a 2 hour tour we decided to go find a pub and maybe some food. we stumbled on one that was filled with fans of some team. we found out that northern ireland was playing football that day against israel. food in pubs in belfast, not as reliable as the food in the republic, so we wandered around looking for a food place ending up at the same indian place as the night before.

day 11: this day we spent on the bus tour of the northern coast. there were several photo op stops before getting the giant's causeway. one was a castle on the water that they've placed fake soldiers in the windows taking aim at you. the second one was really just a pit stop, for coffee. then we were at the causeway. it's this crazy natural phenomenon where the rock is in geometric shapes. and it kind of juts into the sea. it was really beautiful and crazy. we walked all around the coast and climbed the stairs up the cliff and walked the ridge back to the bus. then the bus took us to a photo op of a castle right on the edge of the coast. at one point i guess on of the end rooms fell off into the sea. that's how close it was. the thing about these irish castles is that they are just built up and over the rocks and cliffs and things. it's like they just rise out of the rock. the next stop was the bushmill's brewery. we didn't have time to do the tour and you had to do the tour to get the taster certificate, but my friend did manage to get a taste for free. the last stop of the tour was the rope bridge. we only had an hour and twenty to do it and the sign said it would take an hour, so my friend decided to do it. i had no urge to walk across a rope bridge possibly with some idiot who wanted to shake it so didn't bother with it. luckily they let you walk to the bridge and not cross it if you just want to look at it no charge.

day 12: our whole goal was to get back to dublin and buy all the gifts that we needed for friends and family back home. we took a morning train to dublin. checked into our hostel and went out to shop. first stop was jameson for my boyfriend's gift and a few gifts for my friend's family and friends. then for some bad euro fashions. i got a cute top, a long tank top to wear with leggings. this was the only day that it actually rained on us.

day 13: early morning trip to the airport and flight home. this time i actually flew through toronto. my friend and i killed our 4 hour layover by drinking and eating at an airport bar. my flight was delayed getting home but i was at the wrong gate anyways so it gave me time to realize my mistake and to find the other one. arrived home safe and soundly. luggage intact.

woo! is that enough info? if anyone is planning a trip to ireland, i'd love to help you out and tell of the places i liked in more detail and the places to avoid (like the linen house hostel in belfast).

the whole trip was lots of fun. and i don't think i could point out one thing that was my favorite part. it was all so interesting and beautiful and the people are soooooo nice! and the accent. my poor friend had a hard time understanding some of them so i acted as translator a lot. it usually just ended up being funny. we both had stupid moments. and we're still friends. i'm sure there was frustration at points but never anger or hatred. woo!